mind

More Than Mediocre
More Than Mediocre 1440 964 Nadir Keval

As children, most of us are privileged and fortunate enough to hear and believe that we are capable of accomplishing anything we put our minds to. Our minds are free, full of imagination and limitless possibilities. We don’t concern ourselves with the opinions of others, or the risks of failure. We simply follow our hearts and intuition, and move freely towards what we want, driven to get what we want, no matter the costs.

Then, we begin to interact with people. We begin to see that our dreams and goals are something others have attempted and have failed at. We begin to question if it’s really worth it to take so many risks. We learn about the way things are “supposed” to be, and how we’re “supposed” to live our lives, and are brainwashed into believing that there isn’t much out there for us to achieve, beyond what has already been accomplished by others. Honestly, to call this bullshit would be an insult to bullshit.

Growing up, I was the type of person that had a great deal of potential, and would be reminded of it often by teachers and relatives. The problem, however, was that I would be placed in the most conventional and typical scenarios to fulfill that potential, that I wasn’t able to find a space where I was able to be my true self. In the eyes of teachers and relatives, I was an academic flop, but simply for the reason that they believed I wasn’t trying hard enough. Parent-Teacher interviews usually went like this:

Teacher: Nadir is one of the best young men I’ve met. He’s smart, he’s intelligent, he gets along well with others, and he is always there to help when needed.

Parents: (grinning) Thank you.

Teacher: But…he seems to be very distracted in class, is often late with his assignments, and seems to struggle with tests, even if he understands the material.

Parents: Oh…

The conversation would then lead to my parents asking the teacher how they could help me, the teacher suggesting tutoring, a schedule, my parents checking and signing my homework book every night, etc. I tried every single one of those things, but nothing seemed to work. It worked for some others, but for me, it just didn’t work. This continued all the way into university, until I came to a point of making the conscious decision to find a new way.

That was when things seemed brighter in my eyes, despite the fact that I was now being called, “A jack of all trades, and a master of none.” That didn’t sit well with me, because I knew that it was possible for me to become more than just one thing. I didn’t want to be mediocre. I looked at the lives of those around me and those I heard about on TV or in the dreadful gossip circles you see at most events. Most people seemed to be miserable with their lives. They hated their jobs, they had lost all romance in their relationships (if they were in one at all – some find singlehood to be the ideal lifestyle, by the way…for me, having someone to share a life with and to be completely comfortable with is one of the most beautiful things life has to offer), they always wanted what they didn’t have and were upset and unsatisfied with what they did have. I looked at that and saw horrifying examples of what following the societal path to “success” looked like.

I decided that enough was enough. I decided that I would go after my goals, and create more dreams and goals as I went along. I decided that if someone told me that I would never be able to accomplish one of my goals, it would then be a personal challenge to make sure that I accomplish it, simply so I can know in my heart that I’m capable of more than what’s expected of me.

I quickly learned that being mediocre was something that just didn’t work for me. I believe I am destined for greatness, destined to be more than mediocre. Why let others dictate what I am and am not capable of?

“Never let anyone’s thoughts, words, or actions towards you dictate the value of your life. Do right by God and do right by you. Focus on those two things and, by the will of God, the rest will come together in the best way possible.” – Nadir Keval

The world is filled with people with lives that are so incredibly similar, while having the potential of being so incredibly unique. What takes us away from being the best we can be is the fact that we become accustomed to living according to what others tell us is okay, acceptable, and realistic. Personally, I call bullshit on that again! I often tell this to my mentoring clients, and I’ll share it with all of you: The key to success lies in a balance of two things…knowledge of your beliefs and values with the action to back it up, balanced with a ridiculously driven and unfaltering work ethic towards making your dreams and goals a reality.

I hope you can take this information and go after your dreams, knowing that every single one of us is capable of being far more than mediocre. You have your own unique purpose in this world, and the best way you can achieve it is by never giving up on becoming better at being you. I’d love to hear your stories on how you’ve come up against the challenges of being your best you, and how you dealt with it. Leave a comment below to get the conversation started!

Freedom from Within
Freedom from Within 1920 1200 Nadir Keval

What does it mean to be free? We all have our own definition, based on the conditions our lives are in. For some, it’s being able to sit in your home without the fear of having a military attack destroy your home, for some it’s a battle in your mind, and for others, it’s being able to have a say in your own life’s decisions and path. These matters enslave some of us without us even realizing it. If or when it’s realized, minds go into a state of panic, causing a frantic effort to break free. Every struggle of freedom holds at its core the same goal: to have one’s right to make personal decision made available.

The right to have the final say in everything that you do and pursue in your life is something that is unfortunately a rare thing to see in most parts of the world. How many of us have to tail or our lives and the pursuit of our goals, all to accommodate the people in our lives and their dreams? How many of us pursue the same path drafted out by society for practically everyone of going to school, having a gender-specified hobbies and interests, getting a degree/diploma, working a 9-5 job most likely not in your field of study just to pay off the tens of thousands of dollars in student loans, get married while in severe debt, buy a home on mortgage (increasing your debt), have children (a blessing, but tougher when in debt), grow old hating your job (unless you’re one of the lucky ones), and one day look back and wonder how life passed by so quickly without you even getting the chance to pursue your goals, passions, or challenges? So…that was a dark picture. Unfortunately, I’m pretty sure I just described most of our lives, and sadly left many of us depressed. If I did, I apologize. The reason I did that is because unless we hate hell and everything that leads to it, we won’t know how badly we want heaven. Obviously, I’m speaking metaphorically, but you get what I mean.

It’s important for us to find and form our own identities by taking risks and challenging ourselves outside of our comfort zones. It’s far too easy to fall into the norms and patterns created by society. We must ask ourselves what we want out of life, what we hope to accomplish, and then work towards those things. The path that fits you best might even end up being similar to the norm, but what’s important is that you choose and pursue that path out of your own will and desire, and not out of conformity to any expectations.

There are some people in the world whose freedom isn’t an option for them. Even if they work their hardest, put in all the effort they possibly can, they just can’t seem to acquire their freedom. But, for most of us, freedom is possible. It’s about overcoming our personal barriers, created by our minds to hold us back from doing anything unsafe. That, however, isn’t what’s best for our growth, and instead, prevents us from being the best we can be. Recognize how blessed we are to have the ability to embrace our freedom. It will take hard work and fighting our inner souls at times, but it’s a dream many don’t have the opportunity to fulfill.

Evaluate your life and ask yourself what it is you want to accomplish, and what it is that’s holding you back from getting what you want. If you are unhappy, figure out what the cause is and keep your distance from that, or fix the situation to turn it into a source of happiness. I assure you it will be difficult. I assure you it will be painful. I assure you it will have you questioning yourself and your motives time and time again. But if you push through it all, I assure you that it’ll be completely worth it.

Video: Finding Balance
Video: Finding Balance 934 525 Nadir Keval

In our lives, we are brought challenges, struggles, opportunities, and more, and if not balanced, we can quickly get overwhelmed, resulting in us drowning in our own potential. Many of us grow up without much responsibility, and when it comes down to it, we’re advised by our parents, providers, or whoever we depend on, to focus solely on one thing at a time while they take care of everything else. For example, we go to school, and often, if we’re privileged enough, are told to not work or do anything else and just focus on getting good grades. The reality of life, however, is that when life kicks in, you can’t just focus on one thing. You have responsibilities – a family, your health, your career, your leisure activities, and more. If you focus on just one, you’ll end up getting an avalanche of overdue tasks and responsibilities piling on to you, leaving you incapable of getting back up without an excruciating amount of time and unnecessary effort. Time and energy/effort are two very precious things. Don’t waste them on cleaning up messes you’ve created for yourself. Use them to move forward and upward instead.

Get Your Priorities Straight

One of the first things needed to find balance is to recognize and organize your priorities. Look at the different aspects of your life, label them, and then categorize them according to importance and urgency. In my case, I hold these priorities, in this particular order: faith, family and self, health, passion/work.

Give 100% To Each Aspect

When working on anything, you should always give it your all. But, in order to commit to that completely, you must place focus on one thing at a time. That doesn’t mean that you should work on one thing and neglect everything. Shoot, if I did that, I’d be sending myself to the career graveyard. Instead, place 100% of your focus on each thing in your life when you’re attending to it. So, if you’re at work, be completely at work, and don’t get distracted by unnecessary distractions. If, however, your family calls, or you need to do a prayer, step away from work and attend to your priorities. In my list, faith and family come before passion and work, and so, I step away and respond. One reminder though…if you’re on the family side of that transaction, respect the person’s personal space and responsibilities, and refrain from contacting him or her unless there is an emergency.

Learn more about the things mentioned in this article in the video below:

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