Wisdom

Do a little something…
Do a little something… 2000 1333 Nadir Keval

Read something.
Learn something.
Write something.
Meditate something.
Reflect something.
Grow something.
Believe something.
Love something.

This mindset and series of reminders is one of the ways I keep myself focused and motivated daily. I believe that every day, we are able to work towards accomplishing most of these. Not every day will include all of these goals, but having the higher ambition will result in finding the path to daily betterment.

Taking out time daily to grow and become a better version of yourself through, action, reflection, and ambition, is key to accomplishing our goals and turning our visions into our realities.

Take this mantra and print it out, put it on your wall so you see if every morning and remember that you deserve to grow and take care of you.

What would you add to this list of things you should work on daily?

Try, Try Again
Try, Try Again 1536 808 Nadir Keval

With being halfway through Ramadan 2014, I’ve been giving a lot of thought towards bettering myself this month. One of the things I’ve learned more than almost anything else is how we are very fragile people, and we need to easier on ourselves. It’s important that we do our best to be better ourselves, but when we fail or fall, we shouldn’t give up.

Before Ramadan began, I wrote out a list of goals I had set out for myself. I was determined to let go of some bad habits, develop some new ones, and establish a stronger relationship with Allah. I have to say, it has been a lot tougher than I had anticipated. I figured that if I gave myself a strict schedule, or if I wrote a list of tasks every day and worked on every task one at a time, I’d reach my goals very easily. Then, reality punched me in the face. And for that, I am thankful. You see, I realized that those approaches to reaching my goals were great, but I had to be prepared for the journey of accomplishing them. That meant that I would fall, that I would mess up, that I would make mistakes, and that the key was that I didn’t let that stop me from trying again.

Often, especially considering we live in a time of the need for instant gratification, we become upset with ourselves and get discouraged when something doesn’t work after our first attempt at it. That can be self-destructive, as I’ve learned through my last two weeks’ experiences. See, I would be pumped, ecstatic to reach my goals, but upon having a single hiccup in the process, I would get discouraged or pulled back from wanting to try again. This was a huge reminder to me, especially since I often tell clients, “Allah doesn’t expect us to be perfect. He expects us to simply try to be our best.” Looking back, I can’t believe how true that statement rang for me. I needed that reminder that we are capable of anything in our lives, and we are here for the journey.

I remember hearing a lecture, in which the speaker mentioned a story about Umar ibn Al-Khattab, one of the Prophet (SAW)’s closest friends and the second Caliph of Islam. The speaker mentioned that Umar never concerned himself with the end result of his supplication, whether or not it would be answered, or would be in favour of his desires. Instead, he focused on constructing his dua (supplication) in the best way that he could. This concept made me think, not only in regards to my need to be better with my dua, but also in regards to how I lead my life and strive to become a better man and a better Muslim. I learned that in our lives, it’s important that we keep moving forward, no matter how many times we fall, because it is those same fallings that strengthen our character, as well as our drive and connection to our goals.

Life is something that we cannot always plan for. We plan and Allah plans, and He is the best of planners. What we should focus on is how we react to our experiences. Do we take a optimistic and positive approach to it, or do we wallow in our grief and give up? Remember that Allah has promised us in the Quran that He will not burden us with more than we can bear, so take His Promise as your security blanket, and then go out there and take risks to accomplish your goals. Push yourself beyond your comfort zone. And when the fear of failure presents itself, push it aside and go after your goals.

This Ramadan has been great so far, Alhamdulillah, but with only half of it left, I hope to go above and beyond what I’ve been doing so far to make the most of every moment. I pray that Allah grants all of us ease and success in our goals, and that He allows us all the opportunity to see the next Ramadan with stronger hearts, more faith-enriched souls, and with success in new goals that we never even thought we could consider pursuing. Ameen!

10 Tips for Daily Happiness
10 Tips for Daily Happiness 2560 1532 Nadir Keval

In the world we live in, it’s very easy for us to become overwhelmed or sidetracked by the smallest of things. Still, that is no reason for us to allow our circumstances or the words or actions of others deter us from being happy. Life is a roller coaster of ups and downs, as I mentioned in my video a few months back (The Roller Coaster of Life – Nadir Keval), but the thrilling results are worth the struggling climb.

Throughout my journey in entrepreneurship, faith, health, and the other aspects of my life, I’ve found that there are certain things that are great ways to strengthen our relationships with our own selves. Here are 10 tips I’ve come up with over the years:

1. Keep it simple

When you’re ambitious, or have a lot of things on your plate, it’s fairly easy to overfill our daily to-do list. I did this for years, before I realized that the saying, “Slow and steady wins the race,” is one of the wisest things ever said, especially for one who leads a life in need of self-discipline and unrelenting drive. My suggestion would be to stick to no more than 3-5 things on your daily list of tasks. I guarantee, that will be enough to keep you busy, because in a day, things are bound to come up that are out of your control, and keeping a semi-short list of tasks will help you accomplish your daily goals, while also not leaving you feeling overwhelmed or unaccomplished at the end of the day. If you finish those things, you can always add more things, one by one.

2. Pray

A relationship with God is one of the greatest blessings one can have. It is something that is available to all of us. All that’s required of us is that we reach out for it and respect it. Every person has their own faith, but I can only speak of my own experiences as a Muslim. Amongst the things I love most about my faith is the beauty of prayer and supplication. Through five daily prayers, I am blessed with 5 short vacations, where I can detach from my struggles and goals, and connect with Allah and with my self. Through supplication, I always have someone to speak to when I feel overwhelmed or need help in coming to a decision. The beauty of whom I speak to when supplicating is that He, Allah, is capable of all things and wants what is best for me. How beautiful a feeling it is, to know for certain that I will be okay, and will never be alone, as long as I have faith and prayer.

3. Eat

We live in a world that confuses me. Either we eat too much or we eat too little. Personally, I consider food to be the artistic tools God has given us, with which we can create pieces of art to not only enjoy through vision, but can enjoy as nourishment. Some of these artistic pieces God has given us are art in themselves (try a cold mango on a hot day, and you’ll see what I mean)! My advice: eat well, eat often, and eat pure. Strike balance in your meals and in your day. As the Prophet Muhammad (SAW) said, “The vessels the children of Adam (AS) mistreat most is the stomach. Eat as though your stomach is in three parts. One part for food, one part for water, and one part for air.” (paraphrased)

4. Stay Active

To love food is a great adventure, but just as important as it is for us to enjoy the food that nourishes us, it’s just as important for us to stay active and take care of the body we’re nourishing. Even if it means doing something active for 30 minutes a day, or taking the stairs instead of the elevator or escalator. Start small, and keep moving forward. Do this for you. For some ideas, and more to come, check out my food adventures!

5. Reflect

We live in a day and age that’s all about constantly being on the go, constantly doing “productive” things in order to stay afloat in this world of constant competition. What only the successful realize is that there is a huge amount of benefit to simply taking a few moments for you every day. Turn off all of your electronics, wear something comfortable, and do simply sit and relax. Think about your life, your experiences, your goals, your heart, and your faith. Just think, and find the good in all aspects of your life, especially the things that seem bad, all in order to find peace within.

6. Me-time

I can’t express enough how important it is to do something every day that is just for you. It makes all the difference in your life, in your mental health, in your happiness, in your success, in your peace. Designate one hour per day, without fail, towards doing something just for you. The pressure of the world and of life and those who surround you will make this a difficult task, but do it for you. It’s of the utmost importance.

7. Interact

Solitude is sometimes a phenomenally beneficial thing, and I can attest to how much it’s helped me get things done in my journey towards the fulfillment of my dreams. That said, at times, it could also result in loneliness. We are creatures of companionship. Interacting with others helps us feel and stay connected. It helps us come up with new ideas, and new understandings of the world and the people in it. As I mentioned before, life is about balance, and in the matter of interacting with others, this balancing concept is very important. Spend time on your own, take time to take care of yourself, but be sure to interact with others, to make friends, and to spend time with those who make you happy and inspire positivity in your life.

8. Write

Growing up, we would always hear about girls keeping diaries or journals, and if a boy were to do it, he would be teased for being girly – absolutely nonsensical and childish behavior. Some of the most successful people in the world, men and women, have kept journals as they strived towards achieving their goals. Begin writing. It’s a therapeutic way to keep your self focused, disciplined, and of clear mind. If it were not for my starting to write, by the will of Allah, I probably wouldn’t be where I am today. Though I still have a long way to go, I hope to one day be the owner of a library full of my journals, insha Allah.

9. Sleep

We’ve heard about the importance since we were children. They say you must get 8-10 hours of sleep every night for the sake of your body, mind, and soul. There are many benefits to sleeping well, and that involves more than just the amount of time you spend sleeping. It also includes your conditions of your environment (a hot or cold room, lights being on, your computer buzzing away, etc), what you sleep on, whether or not you go to bed refreshed and calm, and so much more. Be sure to sleep well, and listen to your body. You may be early bird or a night owl. Regardless of which one you are, listen to your body.

10. Smile!

Sometimes, one of the best things we can do when we’re feeling down is force a smile. It can act as inspiration for a real smile 🙂 A smile is one of the things in life that can alleviate pain and sorrow at times when we feel like there is no reason to smile. Not only that, the Prophet (SAW) said that a smile is a form of charity. I’m not sure of how it is in other parts of the world, but I often try to smile at everyone I meet or cross eyes with, and the return of those smiles and the happiness it brings is indescribable. Smile, you’ll change lives…if not the lives of others, it’ll change your own life.

Now, I’d like to hear from all of you! Do you have any ideas or tips of your own as to how to bring about daily happiness? Leave a comment below and get the discussion started :)!

Do Unto Others…
Do Unto Others… 2000 1000 Nadir Keval

Most of us have heard it before, be it through our religious teachings or through every day interactions with others:

“Do unto others as you would want done unto you.”

At first glance, this seems like a great mindset, and definitely something to make a part of our lives. But, what often happens is that we forget to consider the other person carefully. It’s about more than just what they’re going through, but it’s also about the person’s character, likes, and dislikes. For example, I am a person who benefits more from “positive reinforcement”, while the person I may be trying to motivate or encourage could be more inclined towards “negative reinforcement”. If the person gets a grade of 97% on an exam, he may need to hear, “Great job, but where’s the other 3%??” while I am the type to need to hear, “Great job! 97% is an awesome grade!”

Sounds like a pretty similar approach, but the difference comes through understanding what works for the person you’re talking to. When we try to help others, it’s important that we take out the time to make sure we understand the person and their specific needs, not only in what needs to be said or done, but in how action is taken as well.

In most cases where this quote comes into play, it’s a quick back and forth with a person, and we jump to give advice instead of taking a moment to withhold our tongues and to think of what we’re saying and whom we’re saying it to. In times like those, it’s important to always keep in mind that we are all different and all have our own daily struggles, so we must always tread lightly. You never know what a person might be going through.

Every situation is different, but there are some basic steps to start with when trying to help someone out or when giving advice. Check out these steps and use them the next time you’re in a position to help and treat people well:

1. Build a comfort zone

When you know a person, it’s easier to build a comfort zone using your past experiences with them, your relationship overall, and what you know makes them happy. For example, I have a friend who loves anime, so when advising him, I would ask him about a show he may have mentioned in the past and spoken passionately about. After creating a comfort zone, take the next step.

2. Ask the right questions

Once the comfort zone is there, it’s time to ask questions that help slowly bring out the concerns the person is having. Start with open-ended questions, and then work your way to the details. You’ll see that if the person is willing or wanting to talk, the details will slowly work their way into the discussion.

3. Maintenance and Reminders

The key when talking to someone and advising them is to maintain the comfort zone by letting them complete all of their thoughts and say whatever is on their minds, without interruption. In addition to that, reminders of being there for them and caring about them helps in helping them feel that they aren’t alone in their struggle and that they can pull through.

Keep in mind that these are simply guidelines. Ultimately, each case is different, as I mentioned earlier, but it’s always really important to keep the other person’s personality and needs in mind when giving advice. In fact, it’s important to remember to remember those things when interacting with anyone for any reason. Speak to others with kindness, listen, be patient, and speak the truth with wisdom and sincerity.

The Importance Of Taking Breaks
The Importance Of Taking Breaks 2290 1526 Nadir Keval

Over the last little while, some of you may have noticed that I stopped writing articles, poetry, and quotes, to the extent that I even placed a hold on my site. The reason for this was because I was in a place in my life where I needed to take some time out to myself and really reflect on my personal goals. It was a difficult decision to make, but I felt it was a necessary step in order for me to be the best I could be for myself as a human being on his own personal journey, and as a friend, mentor, or brother to those of you out there that I strive to inspire and motivate in every way I possibly can. I have to say, there are no words to express my gratitude for all of you, your patience, and your appreciation of my efforts.

I know that during this hiatus, I’ve lost some readers and followers here and there, but it was something I believed I needed to. I do hope that those readers and followers return after seeing that I’ve re-launched my blog, but if they choose not to, I wish them all the best.

This break was an experience that truly took me to the next step of understanding myself, and I felt it would be something to share with all of you, so that perhaps, if any of you go through something similar, you would be able to think, “If a guy as crazy as Nadir could get through this, I can too!” See, I was at a point in my life where I felt overwhelmed by all of the things I had going on. It’s true that those things are there because I put them there, and that I often speak about how I pride myself in being involved in many things, while still maintaining sanity and efficiency. What I realized however, is that in choosing this kind of lifestyle, I would have to take a break every once in a while, because if I didn’t, I would burn out. Unfortunately, the way I learned that was by getting so close to burning out that I was left with a few scars. Fortunately though, scars are great reminders.

What held me back from taking a break all these years was that I feared losing my connection to all of you, or that I would lose whatever it was that fueled my ability to write. In a similar manner, I feared that taking a break from my companies and projects would make me lose the connection and attachment I have towards my passions and ambitions. Still, it came to a point that my body and mind began to weaken in their abilities to inspire me and help me keep going. It was definitely time for a break.

Short breaks

In the process of learning about the importance of taking breaks, I realized that it was about more than just taking long vacations or breaks every few months. As necessary as breaks like those may be, I found that what maintained my every day sanity was the small breaks I would take every day. What that meant was that I would put aside some time every day towards a personal goal, or towards simply resting and doing nothing. My attachment to ambition and drive made that difficult at first, but I forced myself beyond my comfort zone because I knew it was a necessity in order for me to see any chances at growth. Here are some tips, based on what I’ve learned:

  • Do something for yourself every day that’s unrelated to anything you do, or any specific deadline – even if it’s just for 15-30 minutes of your day
  • Try something new once a week, to challenge yourself and to keep your mind and body guessing
  • Interact and socialize with people at least once every 1-2 weeks, solely for the sake of socializing – personally, I meet up with a few friends for coffee every two weeks, and we talk about life and ideas, without much reference back to our work or school lives

Long breaks

There are the obvious kinds of long breaks, like a week long vacation to a new place or a place you find comfort, but there are times when that can become a bit hurtful to our wallets. During times like those, put away all of your work stuff, school stuff, or anything related to your everyday routine, and just wake up every morning with something new scheduled in. For example, if you live in a place known for its tourism, spend a week living like a tourist, checking out the attractions, gardens, trails, events, etc., and come home every night to cook yourself a meal (and I mean, really experiment with new recipes and cuisines) or go out for dinner to a place you never thought you’d try. That’s what I’ve got planned for my next vacation, and I have to admit, I’m excited!

Long breaks seem like a big risk, especially if you have a lot of things on your plate. As an entrepreneur, it took a lot to make me realize that it was important for me to step away from it all for a short while, but after recognized the importance of it, I took the leap. Looking back, I don’t regret a minute of my break, and yearn for the opportunity to enjoy it again in the future, God-willing!

Earning your break

One other thing I’d like to talk about is the importance of recognizing the value of yourself and the value of a break. For the longest time, my businesses weren’t bringing in much income, and I was really struggling financially. I had to work harder than I ever had in my life, while making much less than I ever had. Still, I stuck to it, but eventually, I was drained. I needed a break, but I felt like I hadn’t earned it yet because I wasn’t making the amount of money I wanted to. Sure, things were looking up, and the finances were building, but they were nowhere near enough for me to go off on an expensive vacation or anything like that without taking a major financial hit. Every day started to become a chore, and I was starting to hate my career, not because of what I did for a living, but because I didn’t have the energy anymore. I learned, after speaking to a few close friends, that I actually had earned my break because of the hard work and effort I had put in every day to get to where I am. I was reminded that success isn’t about how much you make, but it’s about how much you value your efforts at the end of every day. If you’re happy with yourself and your effort, then take a break. If not, and you still feel the need for a break, then make a plan for doing better, then take a break, but get cracking on implementing that plan as soon as you’re break is over.

Look at it this way: when working out, you take breaks between each set, be it 30 seconds or a minute or two. Then, you take a break of at least 24 hours between working each muscle group, in order to give that specific muscle group enough time to recover. The truth is, rest and recovery is just as important to growth and development as hard work and ambition is. It’s all about balance and moderation. Work hard, push beyond your comfort zone, and take care of yourself through rest and recovery, because it’s with these three ingredients, along with faith and reliance on God, that we’re able to see results and success. Like they say, every once in a while, you have to stop and smell the roses. If you don’t, you’ll go on through an entire lifetime without having ever really lived.

Universal Laws of Seeking Marriage
Universal Laws of Seeking Marriage 2652 1674 Nadir Keval

In my journey towards settling down and finding someone crazy enough to marry me, I’ve learned a lesson or two. I’m not married yet, so Lord knows if they’re all right, but so far, I feel they’re pretty universal.

First, work on getting your relationship with Allah on point first, before you try to establish or strengthen any relationship with a significant other. If you can’t show the Creator loyalty and respect, how can you expect yourself to do so for the creation? Be willing to be honest with yourself and hold yourself responsible for what you need to work on. Then, work on those things.

Second, know who you are and what you believe in, and recognize what is most important to you. Too many people today jump into marriage or the pursuit of marriage for the wrong reasons. Their priorities are physical release, escape from their current condition, or desperation and loneliness. Be patient. Understand yourself, so you can better navigate through life when your identity is questioned…which is something that happens more often than we care to admit.

Third, learn to differentiate between the deal makers/breakers and the things that are merely preferences and not requirements. After knowing yourself, know what is immensely important to you. For example, I strive to live a healthy and active lifestyle, and want to grow in that aspect of my life. Personally, I want to marry someone who has a similar lifestyle. Sounds minor, but laziness is contagious and it’s a deal breaker for me.

Fourth, never settle. That should be enough to make my point, but I’ll put it this way: you are a person of value and the sooner you recognize that, the sooner you’ll realize that finding someone that appreciates your value is worth the wait.

Fifth, look for someone better than you in one way or another so you are always aspiring towards betterment. This will keep you humbled and will keep you motivated. Be the best you can be, and you will also inspire your significant other to be their best as well. This will benefit you as individuals and as a couple.

Sixth, don’t judge. Easier said than done, I know, and of course to some degree, you will be judging a person when you consider them for marriage. Still, there is a difference between evaluating a person’s compatibility with your preferences, and holding negative ideas about a person because they may not measure up to your “checklist”. Just as you’ve recognized that you have worth and are valuable in your many unique ways, you’ve probably also seen your flaws. You wouldn’t want someone judging you for your flaws, so be smart, and don’t judge others for theirs.

Seventh, understand that perfection doesn’t exist. Unless you are in fact perfect (and no, you’re not, because if you think you are, you a hold a degree of arrogance, thus making you human and flawed), you would be purely idiotic and ignorant to expect perfection in whomever you meet. Get that fantasy girl/guy out of your head and live in the real world, because that “perfect” person you’re dreaming up is one of the few dreams I will tell you isn’t going to come true. Find perfection in your own imperfections and after that, you will be able to more easily be able to see the beauty in the imperfections of others.

Eighth, do it right by Allah or don’t do it at all. The former fills your life with blessings and the latter, more often than not, leads to a bumpy road and a more solidified uncertainty in your Hereafter. I chose to leave this at the end of the article to remind us that at the end of the day, it’s ALWAYS Allah first. His Approval is our greatest priority, and this is a fact that should never be forgotten, but often is.

I’m not a scholar, sheikh, maulana, imam, or anything like that. There are simply my own personal laws to abide by as I search for a woman to spend the rest of this life and the Hereafter with. Take what I’ve written here with a pound of salt, and then some. I’d love some feedback from fellow single people that are searching for that special someone, or from married couples that could shed some insight based on their own experiences. Leave a comment in the section below to share your thoughts.

To Be Happy
To Be Happy 4000 1160 Nadir Keval

I believe that when we are born, we are all blessed with a natural disposition towards the pursuit of happiness. It is only due to the environments we are raised in that we end up losing that desire for it. Sure, many of us spend a good portion of our lives striving towards having a stable and secure income, the perfect spouse, that ideal family, enjoyment of all types of foods, and a body that would make Greek mythology seem reflective of the average physique. Is all of that possible? Of course it is, but it takes immense amounts of hard work, ambition, self-esteem, patience, and faith – things very few of us are willing to apply to our lives.

What we acquire in life, and how successful we are is often judged based on our bank balances, the size of our houses, the brands of our clothes, and the price tag of our cars. Notice how it’s all related to money? We have become slaves to the things we have created – paper with ink on it, which we claim to be of value because of some sort of signature on it that makes it unique. Money is the largest and longest running ad campaign in human history. We have been convinced and conditioned to make something so worthless into something considered priceless at times. How’s that? Consider being in a situation where law requires you to pay for anything you eat, and that the clerk selling you food must take money from you in order to make the transaction and avoid penalties.  Add to this the fact that you have not eaten for days and have no money with which to purchase food. Other than doing something that could result in you being punished by law, in some cases, to the point of death, you really have no choice but to move forward without nourishment. That mere dollar or two would thus become priceless to you because it is a matter of life and death. This example may seem a little farfetched, but sadly, it’s a truth to thousands of people around the world who live in impoverished places and have nothing to eat or drink. (We must put forth our utmost effort to help those in need, be it as close as home or in places where their basic necessities have become luxuries. I have chosen not to speak further on the importance of helping others in this article, as it takes away from the core of what I am trying to get across. I will, however, speak on the topic in the near future, as it is something I am very passionate and concerned with.)

Yet, look at those people, and you will find that they live out their lives, though often shortened by their unfortunate conditions, with happiness, contentment, and a sincere sense of peace in their hearts. They no longer have attachments to material gains, but rather, attach themselves to faith, family, and hope. We, however, live privileged lives. While others around the world are in conditions where their bare necessities are turned to luxuries, we are living with major luxuries being considered necessities – “Oh, you can’t do much unless you have a cell phone,” “I’m not going to buy those shoes! I want those [insert major brand name here]!” “But what am I supposed to do all day if the TV is out??” We are spoiled. We are pathetic.

Take a look at your life, and ask yourself how much of your time you spend being active? Is your faith the core of your lifestyle? Do you eat to nourish yourself, or to deal with emotions or addictions? Why are you still at your current job? Are you pursuing a passion in at least one component of your life? Ultimately, are you happy? Questions like these are ones that we must ask ourselves often to keep ourselves in check.

For years, I worried about the intangible things, like wealth, careers, food, etc. When I changed my mindset towards focusing around my faith, I found peace. That doesn’t in any way suggest that I don’t have struggles or issues of my own to deal with on a daily basis. That doesn’t mean that I am perfect and completely practice what I’ve written about here, without flaws or errors. What it means is that I no longer felt an attachment to things that I knew would pass. It also means that I am more satisfied and content with my life, and am more open and flexible when it comes to change. I used to think that things had to be done a certain way, and that without pursuing things in that same path, I would be guaranteeing myself a sense of failure and loss. But now, I live with fluidity and flexibility, and am able to adjust to situations with much more ease. I have my affections and attachments, but if they are lost from my life, I no longer feel the need to mope around or be depressed about it, Alhamdulillah.

Life is filled with expectations and norms, but that does not necessarily mean that it’s what best for you. Hold your own goals, work hard, and commit to your dreams and ambitions, but practice fluidity and flexibility through attachment to faith in order to transition smoothly through the turbulence of life. Find a passion, and make an effort to pursue what makes you happiest. Forget the rules of anything but morality and faith, and focus on pursuing happiness as a child without fear and full of imagination. And always, ALWAYS remember to give back and help others, because that is the fastest route to happiness and gaining more true success.

To Spark My Drive
To Spark My Drive 1440 1280 Nadir Keval

There are a few things that I use in my every day speech and thought in order to keep myself grounded, driven, and focused. I felt that sharing this on my blog would be a great way to make it more real for myself, and maybe to spark the same drive in others. I’m also often asked what keeps me so driven and ambitious despite facing so many obstacles, responsibilities, and struggles. I haven’t always realized that these were key parts of what kept me going, but upon recognizing them, putting them into words, and engraving them into my mind, I’ve become far more focused in implementing them and reaching my goals.

So, here they are:

“Allahumma Asta’aan” (“From Allah we seek assistance”)

This is something I picked up from having spent a lot of time with my close friend and sheikh, Abdurrahmann Murad. He has a habit of saying it, and it wasn’t until someone I met for the first time said, “You must be a close friend of Sheikh Abdurrahmann’s.” I laughed and asked, “What makes you say that?” He responded, “Because the person known for saying Allahumma Asta’aan in our community here in Vancouver is Sheikh Abdurrahman.” That made me feel good, not only because I learned that I was learning about my faith and implementing it without even knowing it, but also because this thing that I had learned was incredibly beneficial to moving forward.

It’s often very easy to get overwhelmed and thus discouraged from moving forward when something feels like it is more difficult than we can handle. Reminding yourself that we seek assistance from Allah, you are humbled and reminded that you are capable of so much more when you place your trust and reliance on Allah. You work hard towards becoming the best you can be, but keep yourself from becoming arrogant through humbling yourself with the remembrance of Allah. In addition to this, this statement acts as a reminder that you are never alone, which is something we can all use sometimes.

“Go big or go home”

It wasn’t until quite recently that my best friend made me realize that this statement has been something I’ve lived by, for the most part, throughout most of my life. With taking an unconventional approach towards pursuing my career goals, by taking bold (according to my best friend) steps towards getting what I want, and not being afraid to fail, and so much more, “Go big or go home,” is definitely a big part of what makes me who I am. I have a tendency to want to do any and everything that I’m afraid of, or that I’m told I’m not able to do.

This mentality is one that I think will help people in really going all the way in trying to become the best they can be, and in trying to accomplish as much as humanly possible in the various aspects of life. This is a great thing to hold tightly to in life, because it gets you excited and ambitious towards doing more and becoming better.

“Not too worried about it”

This is something a friend of a friend says often, and though I’ve never met him, these words have really helped me alot. It’s kind of crazy how he had such an impact on my life despite having never met me. I’m hoping to do the same for others with what I do for others through all of my pursuits, Insha Allah.

We live so much of our lives wasting time and energy worrying about what may be or what may come. Instead, with this mindset of reminding yourself to often say things like, “I’m not too worried about it,” you’re able to simply do your best and move forward with life. What’s meant to happen will happen regardless of what you want, and what ends up happening will always be what’s best for you, even if you don’t like it, because Allah is there helping you through your life.

These are just some of the things I do and think of in order to keep myself moving. Drive and ambition are key components of reaching success, regardless of how you define success in your life. Whether you’re trying to become an artist, a doctor, an at-home parent, a sibling, anything, you must have ambition and must be driven towards being the best you can be, if you are sincerely intent on becoming successful in whatever path you choose. I hope my personal reminders benefit you in some way, and would love to hear feedback from all of you so that I can work towards becoming better. Leave a comment below!

When My Patience Wears Thin
When My Patience Wears Thin 1701 1129 Nadir Keval

We all go through times when our patience is tested. We’re pushed to the edge, either by others or through our own overthinking, and it’s at that point that we find our patience wears thin. When this happens to me, I become anxious, annoyed, and irritable. I begin to fall into a daze, where I find myself not caring about anything or anyone, and focusing solely on myself. Focusing on oneself isn’t necessarily a bad thing, but it can be destructive if it isn’t balanced with giving back in some way or another. So, when I find myself in predicaments like these, I first turn to Allah. I pray two rakah (segments) of prayer, and supplicate while in prostration, asking Him to give me peace, calm, and serenity. It’s far too easy to fall prey to the stresses and hopes of this world, which can be scary and fatal, especially when it leads to us distancing ourselves from the hopes and aspirations of the Hereafter. Just the other, I was speaking to a friend about this. We discussed how in the past, during the time of the Prophet (SAW), he and his companions would have such a strong focus on their Hereafter, that this life was like a simple pit stop towards their ultimate goal of Paradise.

“Live in this world as a traveler or a stranger.” – Prophet Muhammad (SAW) [Bukhari and Tirmidhi]

This life we’re leading is something we should really consider as being a mere tool with which we can prepare ourselves for the Hereafter. That relates to so many matters of life, but to focus on the topic at hand, I’ll speak on how this relates to patience. We all live these rushed lives, trying to constantly get something done to fulfill our need for instant gratification. We become obsessed with how others are leading their lives, and feel the need to follow their examples without a moment’s consideration as to whether or not what they’re doing is right or wrong, beneficial or harmful. We live based on our desires and feel that we must embrace those desires in order to live well, forgetting that what makes us different from other creatures in this world is that we have been given the intellect to make sound judgments and moral decisions. These blessings make it possible for us to live within guidelines and boundaries we have set up based on morals and beliefs. What kind of a life are we leading if we focus on what is temporary instead of what is eternal and everlasting? That’s like accepting pennies when you could earn millions by putting in the same effort, but just readjusting your priorities. I know it’s much easier said than done, because we have been created to have emotions, desires, and wants, but everything must be maintained within reason and moderation. I believe in letting our imaginations soar, and to never accept anything less than the best, but what is beautiful about that is that a good portion of that is reliant upon Allah’s Wisdom and Decree. When we want something or strive towards achieving something, it’s important to remember that the results of our efforts are in the Hands of God, and that everything that happens to us is what is best for us, even if we don’t see it then. Reevaluate and readjust your priorities. Be content with what life throws your way, but never be satisfied with it, because there is always hope for more. There are no limits to how far we can go when we put our hearts and faith, and ambition and effort towards what we want. But, there are also times when what we want isn’t really what’s best for us, and so, we don’t get what we want, or are left to learn the hard way. Either way, what comes is for our benefit, and we just need to keep moving forward. I’ve done it, and so I’m sure any of you can. Sure, life has beaten me to the ground time and time again in the past, but I know that I will never face anything I can’t handle, and so, I get back up, regardless of how hard it is or how long it takes, and keep moving forward.

“Allah does not charge a soul except [with that within] its capacity. It will have [the consequence of] what [good] it has gained, and it will bear [the consequence of] what [evil] it has earned.” – Quran (2:286)

Here are some tips based on what I’ve learned to do when my patience has been tested:

  • Take a break – This can be something as simple as putting down your phone, headphones, and everything else you may be carrying and just going for a walk – you, yourself, and God. Or, it can be something like taking a day or two off. Don’t worry, you’re not wasting time, or losing money (refer to the stupid saying, “Time is money.”). You’re recuperating. You’re recharging yourself so that you can be better, stronger, and more driven. You weren’t created to constantly be working. You were created to live a balanced life, so find balance, damnit!
  • Increase worship – Your connection with God is something that will change your complete outlook towards life. When a distance has grown between us and God, we begin to question everything with ignorance, and lose faith and hope that everything will be okay. Your relationship with God is your greatest weapon against insanity, so embrace it, develop it, nourish it, and thank God for being your greatest friend and supporter. Whenever you can, take a second and supplicate or pray, just to get that reconnect with God. Think about it: since having cell phones and social media, how many times do we talk to our friends in a day? God has been there all this time, and staying in touch with him doesn’t cost you a three-year contract and a monthly bill. In fact, HE rewards you when you keep up with Him. How awesome is that?!
  • Go fishing – Okay, so maybe you don’t HAVE to choose fishing as your activity, but do something that’s relaxing and doesn’t require much effort, but also gives you a chance to be productive and grow. I personally like fishing because it forces me to be patient. You spend a lot of time trying to catch something, and it really makes you have to be quiet and patient as you wait for the sudden and often subtle movements of the line to know if you’re getting a bite. Sometimes, that leads to catching something, and sometimes it doesn’t. When you do catch something, it’s a great sense of accomplishment, not because of a physical feat, but because you’ve overcome impatience and achieved something that has been done for centuries throughout history. When you don’t catch something, it’s an opportunity for building humility, because you’re reminded that not everything goes your way all the time, and that it was written for you today.
  • Take care of YOU – This can involve so many things from meditation, exercising, eating well, hanging out with close friends, etc. The main point is to remember that you have to take care of yourself in order for you to make the most of life and be as successful as possible. Life’s not running away from you. What’s written for you will be yours, and what isn’t, wont. BUT, what you have to do is make the most of every moment, which includes you working hard at some times and taking breaks at others, eating clean and healthy most of the time and indulging in your favourite treat sometimes, etc. And all of this is stuff you should do without feeling guilty. Don’t call it a cheat meal, call it a treat meal. Don’t call it a lazy Sunday, call it a recharge Sunday. Get what I’m saying?

When things get overwhelming and our patience with ourselves or with others begins to wear thin, I find that it’s often a signal our body is sending us to take a moment to ourselves and come back to our centre point. Don’t let patience become your enemy, but instead, consider it that friend that calls you out when you’re in need of some tough love. Take some time out to take care of you, and remember that it’s okay to put things off for a day (don’t make this a habit though – that’s how procrastination is born), as long as you maintain balance and come back with stronger ambition, passion, and drive. Now, go out there and patiently persevere and make your dreams a reality!

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